Scottish education minister Mike Russell MSP has ordered the teaching of cretinous insular values in schools after 5 Birmingham schools, and now Buckie High were found to have been the subject of underhand Trojan Horse plots. Whilst David Cameron and Michael Gove have their hands full trying not to offend Muslims who are trying to impose a “narrow, faith based ideology” , Mike Russell has similarly accused Buckie’s local “in-comer” parents of trying (through election to school boards) to impose “normal English” language in classes, impose ” good manners and common decency” into the curriculum and generally educate Buckie’s kids to an “acceptable level by national standards”.

“Although all secondary schools in Scotland have a duty of responsibility to educate and nurture the local school population we feel that this has never been the way in Buckie”, said Mr Russell, “Buckie likes to segregate their kids into clever and numbskull streams. The annual clever kid is left to study on their own with a computer whilst the rest of the knuckle-dragging, Neanderthal-gened population are put in several secure units and taught vowels by all available teachers and a policeman. Any show of manners is thoroughly resisted and compassion and sensitivity are discouraged.”

Local parent Mo Ronic has condemned the in-comer agenda. “We divna like do-gooders wi’ thone fan-toosh ideas aboot decent human values …an ‘at..” whilst headmaster Lachie ¬†Values has denounced the schemers evil agenda ..”Education, ¬†values, intellect,….fuck off min, we leave a’ that shite tae Milnes High in Fochabers”!!